Sad Commentary on Our Lives

Okay, Here's My Deal...

My oldest son, 3, and my husband went to another town for an errand last night. Then they weere going to Wal-Mart. My husband calls me and said, "Your son's world just got turned upside down>" I asked why and he said that they had pulled into parking lot of Wal-Mart and our son yelled, "It's green!!" He meant the color scheme of the store. It is a green Wal-Mart and the others he has been to are blue.

It is a sad state on your life when your preschooler knows that Wal-Mart is "supposed" to be blue...or when you pull into the parking lot and he says, "We're back!" We just spend too much time there, I guess. As I have said before, "Wal-Mart Wal-Mart, that's our store...we shop there because we're poor!!"

Can't Fool Him

Okay, Here's My Deal...

My oldest son is 3. Since he was about 2 1/2, we started giving him some of the chewable medicines like Dimetap instead of fighting him with the liquids. We started calling it "special candy" and he would gobble it right up. The past few times he has had a cough we have given him the disolving ones. The other night, my husband told him he needed to take his candy and our son said, "No, not that candy. Real candy." And he pointed to the bag of Smarties that I had bought as a stash for my desk drawer at school. He is a smart cookie.

Frying and Rollercoasters

Okay, Here's My Deal...

There are certain things in life that scare a person and , those same things can then scar you for a long time. For me, it's frying and rollercoasters.

I am not much of a cook. And, basically, I don't fry. Bacon, hamburgers, saugage...if it needs to be fried, my husband does it. Before him, well, I bought nukeable bacon and only ate hamburgers if someone else cooked them. See, frying can hurt you. The grease pops and hurts you. Yes, I am a wimp. A few weeks ago, we thought hanburgers sounded good and we did not have gas for the grill. For some inexplicable reason, I said I would do it. And I did and it was freeing. Called my parents to brag. My husband said, next, it is bacon!! Um, no. That is not going to happen anytime soon. Can Guarantee it.

Buchanan County Fair. Can't remember the year. Midway. Kiddie rollercoaster. Or, as I ahve always called it, deathtrap on a rail. I was in elementary school and this thing could not have been more than three or four feet off of the ground at its highest point. But, it was so herky jerky and rickety that I was frightened out of my mind. So much so that it took me a long time to get over it and venture onto larger coasters at Six Flags--but I did. In fact, in Kansas City, I was heard to scream, "Who's your mama?!?!" on a coaster that took me on 4 loop-de-loops. But, I was still the kiddie rollercoaster's bi**h. Well, yesterday, we took our sons to a festival with a midway. My oldest wanted to ride the kiddie coaster and my husband laughed and took his hand. I said, "I'll do it." He asked if Iwas sure. "Yes." and I did it and it was scary but it is the bi**ch now!! Called my parents to brag.

Sometime, I will tell you about wooden bridges...aaauuuggghhh!!!!!!

Hot-N-Fluffy

Okay, Here's My Deal...

I really don't have too much to say right now as I need to get going and help my husband with tidying up the house, but really this entry is just to make him smile anyway. The title of this entry has become an inside joke between us. Hon, you make me smile and laugh at times when I really need to--you are awesome!!! Okay, the rest of you can quit gagging now...I am done!

Good Sign?

Okay, Here's My Deal...

I was on fire today! I had gone in to do some work in my classroom before officially returning for the new school year next week and had a list of things that I wanted to ask my principal about--a couple of which were tings I was not sure how to broach and did not think I would get. However, there must have been something in the water today or the heat index of over 100 F got to his brain because he agreed with all of my requests and it was actually a nice meeting. I sure hope this is a sign of good things to come this year. Can't believe I am starting my 17th year of teaching middle schoolers in a few days. Man I am feeling old...why, you ask?

• I am now teaching with people who were my students.
• I have taught the child of a former student (yes, she got pg in hs).
• One of my former students is a nurse at my kids' pediatricians.
• There are only two people in my building that have more seniority than me.
• I now have fewer years to retirment than years I have been teaching.

STOP Already...It Is Too Fast

Okay, Here's My Deal...

Yes, I know, another post in the same day. Crazy.

It amazes me how much my oldest son, 3, has changed just this summer and in the last month especially, it seems. The post right below this told about this morning's awakening. Tonight, he pulled out some stuff that I found amusing and a little sad becasue he is just grwoing up so fast.

After we picked them up at the sitter, I came home to nurse the baby and my husband and the oldest went for ice cream and to look at trains. He informed my husband that his belly was hungry. When asked what he wanted to eat, he replied, "Chicken and mash tatoes chicken house." His way of saying KFC.

When we got home from the chicken house, he took my husbands keys while still in the van and said, "I open door myself," and proceeded to pick out the correct key, put it in the lock, turn it and open the door for us.

Later, he was playing in his room, while my husband was on the computer and I was working on lesson plans. He came out and informed me he was making food for supper. I laughed and told him to come tell me when it was ready and I would eat. A few minutes later, I was in with my husband and he came running out of his room yelling, "mam, food's ready! Come check it out!" So, we all went to his room, where he had put down loose leaf paper on his chalkboard table topped with all sorts of mega blocks. He said, "supper's ready." We asked what we were going to be eating and he said, "Macroni cheese." and he handed us each a mega block to eat.

Tomorrow we will be packing his bags for college...I mean, when we actually do that, it will seem like tomorrow. He is growing too fast, but it can't be helped. Sigh.

Like Father Like Son

Okay, Here's My Deal...

In a week, I will go back to school for a new year. I basically have not been in my classroom since my maternity leave, except about three times to grab something I needed. I am also teaching an extra class this year, and have not made time to do any lesson plans for that class yet, so I decided to go in today to work and we took the boys to the sitter.

Well, of course the baby was already up. My husband took the baby and I got ready. Our oldest, 3, had gotten into our bed last night and was still crahsed out there. My husband started to talk to him and tell him it was time to get up and get ready. After a few proddings, he opened his eyes and rolled over only to shut them again. So, I talked to him and the same thing happened. My husband tried again and he sat up, sort of looked at us like, "What the he##?!?!" and then pulled the comfortor completely over his head and snuggled down.

I thought we were going to pee our pants because it was just so funny. My husband said that must have been what he looked like to his paretns growing up because he did the same exact thing to them. He got our digital camera and tried again and got a similar, but not so dramatic reaction from him. We then left him alone and about two minutes later he popped his head out all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed ready to face the world.

Because I am a Nerd, That's Why

Okay, Here's My Deal...

As I wrote my last post just a few minutes ago my husband asked where and how I get all my penguin graphics--I seem to have one specific for each post.

Well, easy...I am a nerd and I used things like google image search and picsearch to find them. It started easily as I wanted some images to add to my stuff at school for my kids. I would find one and copy it and then not save it and have to do it again later...so I started to save them in a big file and now have them at my fingertips. I keep adding once in a while and will still search for more specific ones if none I have seem to fit.

Yeah, nerdy dork geek at your service!

Brother's Keeper

Okay, Here's My Deal...

Took our sons to the sitter tody for part of the day. I went to get them and my oldest, 3, had just fallen asleep...so I let him sleep and brought the 3 month old home to nurse and have mama time.

My husband then went to get the oldest after he got home and he was still sleeping, so he had to wake him up. He stood and catted with the sitter for a while as he held the boy. He said after a few minutes, he lifted his head and looked around, saying, "Where my baby brother go?" "Take brother home." He was just concerned about him. Daddy explained he had already gone...then wondered if he'd be honked off knowing I had been there and not taken him...but he didn't say anything--whew!

I wish I had been there to see the cuteness...

Hurry Up and Wait

Okay, Here's My Deal...

It is the classic repair/installation promise: "We'll be there between 8 & 12." Since you have to be home, that is what you do...you wait. And, it just seems that even though you had nothing planned ofr the day before scheduling this appointment, the moment you know that you can't leave that you want to or find there are things you could be doing instead only not at home....

And, then it is kind of a letdown anyway--I mean, we spent a good chunk of time last night tidying up most ofthe house for this; almost as if "real" company were coming. I say most of the house because, as you know, there are rooms they will never see and you can always shut those doors, anyway. Don't look at me that way--you do it too, be honest. Of course, if we were more tidy to start with...well, that is another whole post. But I digress from the let down part. You do all of this and they come, do their thing and leave--not one moment caring about how your house looks because I am sure they have seen it all and just want to get done and out so the next person who is waiting doesn't have to wait so long.

Gotta go. I have some serious waiting to do because it is now 8:21.

Chemically Re-Balanced?

Okay, Here's My Deal...

Tom Cruise is really not concerned with my life, as he has no clue I exsist, but if he were, he'd be upset. I am going to start some meds tonight for PPD...that is post partum depression if you are unaware of the anacronym. I thought i had "escaped" it this time around (had it with my first, too) but no such luck.

It is difficult because "regular old depression" just makes you feel crappy about yourself as a person, but this makes you feel crappy as a mother and that for me is worse because I would give my life with no questions asked for these boys. I really did not want to go back on meds, but my guys deserve someone who is going to be stable emotionally and be a rational thinker and right now I am not really either one of those things.

However, the fact that I recongnized it and sought help is a good thing. Many women do not.

The fact that my husband is supportive and understanding is a good thing. Many women do not have that to rely on. I know i am lukcy in that regard. He tells me he is proud of me that I am doing something to help myself--but in reality I am helping my sons have the best mama they can have and right now I am not that...at least that is how I feel.

The one thing, well, not the only thing, but the thing I regret most is that I had been told/advised that I could ask for meds while still in the hospital after having my son so that I might avoid delving into the darkness of PPD--but I did not. I thought I was in a stronger place mentally than I was the first time around and simply by "knowing better" and being an "experienced mother" I would not allow it to happen again. Moron.

K9 Non Gratis

Okay, Here's My Deal...

If you frequent my blog, you know about the #$%^ing dog that I talk about. Well, last Sunday morning, I let him out to go potty and now, a week and a day later, we still have not seen him. We, and again, if you frequent my blog, this may surprise you...actually drove around looking for him a couple of times but have not found him. We thnk what may have happened is that someone saw him and lured him away...at least, we hope that is what it is because we don't really wish ill of him and hope that he did not get hurt.

Strange thing is that our oldest son, who is three, has not even mentioned the fact that he is gone and has not asked about him at all, so I guess it is not very traumatic for him. The cat, however, hung around his food bowl for a day or so and then she slipped back into her regualr routine.

Where are You?!

Okay, Here's My Deal...

I know a couple of posts back, I tried to put up a good and brave spiritual front, but after the past few days, I don't think I can anymore. So, I just have to ask quite honestly and seriously:

Where are you, God ...and why do I feel so alone and helpless?!?!?!?!

Me Spongebob You Patrick

Okay, Here's My Deal...

It has become increasingly obvious that our son's creativity and imagination are blossoming nicely and I hope it continues. He has been telling us lately who he is and who we are. Spongebob and Patrick are the latest incarnations...he is Spongebob and we are Patrick It is cute and I hope he keeps this kind of thinking for a long time!