Really, What is MY Deal?!?!

Okay, Here's My Deal...

I just want to know what exactly my deal is, seriously. I think that I am in a sort of crisis of faith again...wondering what God is doing in my life and the lives of the people I love and when He is going to make it clear.

I mean, Dad dying is one thing I am still sturggling to grasp. Not that I love my mom nay less than I loved him, but in all reality, I would have guessed she would have died first with all of her health problems.

Then there is my brother and SIL. They are having issues with having children. And it is really putting a strain on things for them especially in the faith department. It is so hard to understand why God closes some wombs and allows others to bear.

Of course, $$$$ is always an issue...having to get a different car and taking on that payment and Matthew starting preschool this year. Add that to cost of gas, which is thankfully going down--I hope it continues--and food going up. It is insane.

My husband is really starting to organize a new venture that could be huge for him and I am so excited. Really, I am. It is just that I can't seem to get excited about much these days.

I am having some health deals and with school around the corner, well, I hope they clear up soon or they may interfere with school and home. Nothing serious, just a lot of little things all combined with getting older. Not that I am elderly or anything, but I am not a spring chicken.

A couple of other issues I won't even get into on here because it is not an appropriate place.

So I am just a little befuddled and feel defeated right now.