Treated but no Tricks

Okay, Here's My Deal...

Tonight was beggars' night in my community, even though Halloween is actually tomorrow. Towns around here do different nights so that kids can go to multiple places to score sugar. My oldest son was really excited this year. I think he is really understanding the whole thing now. He went as a new Star Wars character: Jacob Fett, son of Boba Fett. Anyway, he had fun. The youngest has no clue really. He wore a Mickey Mouse Halloween shirt with an LED motion triggered flashing light in Mickey's nose. He just rode in the stroller and observed everything around him.

It was a nice time and saw lots of my students--both current and former. And, yes, I am old...some of the formers had their kids with them trick or treating. I guess that is what happens when you teach in a community for 18 years.

Didn't Help Like I Thought

Okay, Here's My Deal...

A few posts back I said something about just wanting to go in to a field and scream until I couldn't anymore.

Well, this morning I did that, sort of. After I dropeed the boys off at their daycare/preschool, I drove a few blocks and then thinking it would do some good just to let out pent-up emotions and frustrations, just started to scream at the top of my lungs all sorts of #$%^&* until I was almost home.

Yeah, don't feel much better and now my throat hurts a little.

When it pours, He reigns...when it pours, He reigns...when it pours, He reigns...This too shall pass...this too shall pass...this too shall pass...blah blah blah--whatever

Helping Hand

Okay, Here's My Deal...

I love the nurse practitioner that I see most often in my doctor's office. I like the other one, too, but P. has really been great with me and my husband through everything these past few months. She knows how tight finances are right now and she has tried to give us as many sample meds as possible. She is really good about checking on your mental state as well as your physical state, too. You need people like that in your life. Family, friends and caring professionals.

It is MINE!! Give it to me!!

Okay, Here's My Deal...

I am not a happy camper. Well, that is an understatement, based upon my last few posts, huh? Well, tonight I am even more unhappy.

We, like many other people across this nation, are not in the best of financial states. A variety of circmstances has led to this and we are doing whatever we can to try and get ahead. (A shoutout to you know who and his wife who are so generouly helping us out best they can!! It means the world to us.) It is so bad that my husband wondered about trying to get a loan...but with our credit and bankruptcy (do NOT tell my mom, she does not know) a few years ago we are not sure that will go well--cosigners anyone?

So, I thought, I would reach into my 403B and get some money. I called and guess what? Even though the money is MINE that I invested, I CAN'T HAVE IT!!!!

That's right...the IRS changed their rules in August making it difficult to get YOUR money out of YOUR investments. You can apply for hardship under 5 circumstances: burial costs, post-secondary tuition, home foreclosure, home purchase and medical bills. That is provided you can prove that it is a hardship to your family. Then, after giving them all of the paperwork, your investment company will look it over and if it fits the IRS guidelines, they MAY give you some of YOUR money.

Well, it just so happens, there are some medical bills we have been having trouble with and have the paperwork to back it up. So, we are getting things together to send to them...However, when you are at a point where you haven't gotten your presciption filled because you need that $10 to put food (bought at the discount of discount stores) on your table for your kids...waiting for some big company to look through paperwork isn't much help!!!!!!!!!!!

So, this is what I say:

What the #$%^&*?!?!?!
Are you #$%^&*ing kidding me?!?!?!
Isn't that a kick in the #$%^&*ing teeth?!?!?!
Did I say what the #$%^&*?!?!?!

Hungry

Okay, Here's My Deal...

Grumpy. Tense. Impatient. Crabby. Snippy. Pi$$y. Growly.

Yeah, those are adjectives that I am sure my family, students and colleagues are using to decribe me right now. Same old same old as far as my attitude goes.

I think my biggest deal is the lack of spiritual food right now. I am so hungry for The Word and I am not getting it. Only been to church once since Dad died in May...and that was by myself, which isn't the best, but I think one of the boys was sick, so my husband stayed home and I went. But that was it and that was months ago :(

Anyway, I guess that is it for now.

Going Bumpless

Okay Here's My Deal...

Well, no pneumonia on my x-rays!! So, I just have to get over this stinking bronchitis wet-my-pants-every-time-I-cough cough...Sorry if TMI. Hoever, I did need to switch the antibiotic I was on. It was that, not the steriod that caused my hives. Will I ever be healthy?!?!

Of Course...

Okay, Here's My Deal...

So I went to the doctor and at first she wondered about Whooping Cough as it is going around right now--and if that was the case, then the entire family would have been quarantined for 5 days--but after listening to my lungs, she decided that it was bronchitis. My lungs had wheezes and crackles in them and you don't get that with the Whoop. After another big fit of coughing while she examined me, she decided to give me a breathing treatment with albeutrol to see if it helped. When she checked my lungs again, they were cleared from the noises except for my lower left lung, so she wanted me to get a chest x-ray to check for pneumonia. I guess the treatments is the same for both bronchitis and pneumonia, so she gave me meds and then sent me fo the x-ray. I got done with that at 5:10p.m. so I won't hear until Monday if there is some pneumonia, but as long as I had drugs, that was good. So, I get up today all itchy. I mean itchy!! And a rash complete with hives. Sure enough, I look up side effects of the steriod she gave me and in rare (read: if it is going to happen, it will happen to the medical freak) cases, rash and hives are possible. Of course.

Walking Death

Okay, Here's My Deal...

This is what I feel like. Walking Death. So sick. Going to the doctor in a few minutes. I think my cold or whatever it was has now mutated into something else. If I am lucky, maybe bronchitis. I sure hope mot pneumonia--but I have not been running a fever, so I don't think that is it. But with my medical luck, it will some new strain that has only recently been discovered, or if I am up to usualy medical par, I will be Patient Zero and it will be named after me. When will I ever be healthy again and when will my life not feel like crap caving in? If it weren't for the smiles and laughter from my boys, don't know how I'd get by.

uugghh...

Okay, Here's My Deal...

What can I say? Still in my funk. The conference was a nice escape for a couple of days and I am glad I went. But now I am back and the real world envelopes me again. And people have been so supportive it is insane. I just don't want to drone on and on about the same old crap. Nothing has changed, but there are a couple additional things that have snuck in that just compound stuff. I want to just go to an empty field where no one is around for miles and just scream scream scream AAUUGGHH!!!!! #$%&*{+!!!!! WHY!?!?!?!?!? $*#&%^!!!!! for as long as I can before I just collapse from sheer exhaustion. Don't htink it would help, but I suppose it wouldn't hurt. But, for now, all I am able to mutter is *sigh*.

I'm Not Weird...I'm a Gifted Pen Klepto

Okay, Here's My Deal...

This entry contains a salute to my Buckeye friend.

I just got back from my state's Gifted Education Conference. It was two days long and I got some good information and ideas for not only my classes, but for my regular education colleagues. I bought a couple of books for my peronal library and will be asked the coordinator for gifted ed in my district to buy some other materials for our professional library.

However, conferences like this are a hosting ground for my pen/pencil/assorted classroom materials kleptomania. Yes, I admit it--I have a thing for scoring as many free promotional pens/pencils/assorted classroom materials as I can during a conference...often times going back to exhibitors three and four times a day if I can fit it in between my sessions.

Well, this conference was a great success for my habit. I would guess over the course of the two days, I scored at least 100 pens and pencils. Two magnifying book marks (one to send to my Buckeye friend), three or four long skinny notepads, three or four shorter notepads and some smiley face gumballs for my oldest son. Oh, and a free fabric bag.

But, my salute to my Buckeye friend is this: I had a vision of something that I would not put past us to do the next time we are at a conference together and I laughed out loud!! In any of the rooms that had tables, the hotel staff put out a piece of paper and a pen that we could use to take notes. Rooms that did not have tables, were not given such amenities. Anyway, as I strolled past one empty room (on my way to the exhibits to steal--I mean, score--more pens) where there were several spots from which participants did NOT take their pens (a concept I have to admit is foreign to me) and I could just envision my friend and I glancing at each other, then looking in all directions to see if it was safe and bolting into the room to completely clear it out of pens and then walking away as fast as possible...to the exhibits of course to get more, well, pens.

I miss our conference adventures, my friend. Remember the corn incident in Platteville?!?!?!

Oh, and I won a prize at one of my sessions! For ansswering the following question. Try it and leave me a comment to see if you are correct:

6 farmers each have 6 baskets which each have 6 cats which each has 6 kittens. How many legs are there in all? Don't forget to add in the farmers' legs.

You Take the Good, You take the Bad

Okay, Here's My Deal...

Two things have happened over the past couple of days. One is that I posted my last blog entry into the Christian Mommie board that I have frequented for a while now. I thought I would have lots of ladies responding to me and just simply saying they'd been there and send my cyber hugs or smileys. Yeah, one mommie responded right away and then there was nothing. This is not the first time this has happened. I pour my heart out and then nothing. But, let one mommie post that their lizard had laid an egg and it was like the world had stopped spinning. So, I decided to stop frequenting there for a bit. I told them I would stop in to see waht prayer requests there were, but that I simply had not felt supported in a while and that I didin't think I could open my heart again there and would no longer be posting. Well, then of course I got lots of responses then abot how I was appreciated there and that they were praying even if they didn't post and yada yada yada. I think it was sincere, don't get me wrong, but a case of too little too late I felt.

Second, I also copied and then elaborated a little on my last post and sent it to several of my personal friends that are my sisters in Christ and to my MIL and SIL in NC and my SIL here in Iowa. The response has been incredible and the love and support and tenderness that I have been shown has simply blown me away. Scriptures have been offered up to me and suggestions for books and the most important things I have gotten are the personal stories from their hearts about seasons in their lives that are/were similar to what I am experiencing.

Sort of reminds me a lot of the Steven Curtis Chapman song, "Carry You to Jesus." Here are the lyrics to it...from the CD Declaration of Dependence:

I will not pretend to feel the pain you’re going through I know I cannot comprehend the hurt you’ve known And I used to think it mattered if I understood But now I just don’t know

Well, I’ll admit sometimes I still wish I knew what to say And I keep looking for a way to fix it all But we know we’re at the mercy of God’s higher ways And our ways are so small

But I will carry you to Jesus He is everything you need I will carry you to Jesus on my knees

It’s such a privilege for me to give this gift to you All I’d ever hope you’d give me in return Is to know that you’ll be there to do the same for me When the tables turn

And if you need to cry go on and I,I will cry along with you, yeah I’ve given you what I have but stillI know the best thing I can do Is just pray for you

But I will carry you to Jesus He is everything you need I will carry you to Jesus on my knees